martedì, giugno 20, 2006

The Guardian is a snotrag

Recently I made the mistake of sending someone who I knew liked the Guardian an alert about a news digest they’re offering – with the message attached that I don’t know why she likes the Guardian so much because the reporters use too many commas. I shouldn’t have made that comment, since obviously she didn’t care, but here’s the thing. The Guardian bothers me. I think it’s slovenly. As a news outlet I hold it just a few notches above the Washington Post. I read them because it’s my job, but they’re both messy punditry and I’d rather read the Economist, the New York Times, even the Globe & Fucking Mail. I’d rather read a commie newsletter and balance it out with the Wall Street Journal. I’ll pass on information about it to oblige a friend, but I refuse to ignore the fact I’m fucking sick of “left” publications that mix up counter-culture and social revolution - and use crappy punctuation while they do it. But I didn’t say any of that. I just commented on the Guardian’s abuse of commas.

Anyways, she got stroppy, saying that even though it was sloppy it chose better things to report internationally than any other paper. I mentioned the International Herald Tribune – a paper which also has the benefit of apparently being proofed before it’s published (I didn’t say that last bit out loud, though). She said she didn’t like the IHT because she’d read it on a plane once and couldn’t get into it. What the fuck do I say to that? Nothing. It'd be like trying to convince Adam Smith man wasn't born into a garden so urban centres may have pre-dated agriculture. I wish people were legally obliged to read three newspapers a day. Or else to read a different newspaper every day. That would be so keen. It’s far, far too easy to choose something that doesn’t challenge its readers – playing to the choir, playing to the choir. How the hell we’re supposed to figure each other out like that, I’ve got no idea.

14 commenti:

Melbine ha detto...

Stroppy - that's an interesting word! I like it.
Hmm, I wonder how long it would take me to get through three newspapers. I suspect three weeks or so??

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

It's pretty fast, once you get used to it.

Melbine ha detto...

Yeah, I can see that..

Hey, do you want Krazy to get you a Bluesfest discount for sure? I wasn't sure what that was left at.

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

I wanted the three day pass, and there's no discount on that, right?

Melbine ha detto...

That's right, either the one day or a pass for the whole festival..so you don't need us to get you anything then?

Masonic Boom ha detto...

Oh come on, the Gruaniad's sloppy subeditorship is long part of its wooly liberal appeal.

And that using too many commas thing - it's just English grammar nerds' idea of fun. Do you hate fun, Spliffey? ;-)

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

Ugh, woolly liberals, I think that's the problem. Woolly liberals let bad things happen to the world while they wonder why other people are silly enough to not be nice woolly liberals like them. And they never think it might be partly because they use sentences as alienating as "the assassination was the 23rd murder in or around Locri in just 14 months; Cotroneo may have known something about the men who carried it out; his subsequent murder ensured he would never talk."

So yes, La Boome. Sometmes I just hate fun. *Hate* it. With its stupid run-on sentences and plaform shoes.

And Mel, I think Blonde Bitch is picking me up a wristband, so I'm good.

Masonic Boom ha detto...

Hating on the Guardian is a national British Middle Class insistution. The same way that the British Middle Classes love to hate on themselves, for being Middle Class.

I was raised on the Guardian. I love it despite, or maybe even because of its faults.

Pass the lambs tongues and ditch the football!

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

Oh, is it? I see. What's bred in the bone will come out in the flesh, I suppose. My grand-dad is going through a sick patch; I'll write him a get-well card about how much I hate the Guardian and maybe he'll feel that his grandkids aren't all unregenerate ice-cream making colonials totally lacking middle-class values. Maybe I'll tack on a bit about how defensive I feel when I see people panhandling.

I *won't* mention wishing I had a room with a revolving door in the same hotel as the Italian national team.

Lady ha detto...

i don't read. it's easier on my grammar and punctuation-loving brain.

people are dumb. i wanna stay in bed today. ::grump::

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

People will be dumb no matter how little you read. You'll just find other things to be pissed off about.

And I don't know if it's escaped your attention, but you're a fonctionnaire . . . if you want to stay in bed, it's your contractual right.

Miss Daiquiri ha detto...

It's true, we just like commas over here, and I speak as an English grammar nerd. At least you've never had to read the Daily Star for work, now that really does suck.

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

True - I have to read the National Post though, and that makes me want to blow my head off. Don't know what that is? Good - hopefully you never will. Stupid fucking National Post. Just thinking about it makes my bad mood worse. With its arse scratching politics and mentalist writing.

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

And now I'm nauseous. WHYYYYYEEEEEEE?

I HATE YOU CONRAD BLACK!