giovedì, marzo 30, 2006

You make me happy when skies are grey

Yay! Charles Taylor has been arrested and sent to Sierra Leone!

The Red Dragon is on wing and it fucking hurts. I'm thinking of taking the anti-spasmodics the Italian doctor gave me for the encephawhatever that was spasming after my defense. Because cramps are like spasms, right? 'Spasm' has got to be one of the funniest-sounding words ever. Besides 'orgasm'. That's a hilarious word. Speaking of which, up until yesterday my only real opinion about the seal hunt here, which I've mentioned more than once before, is that Brigitte Bardot fakes a shitty orgasm. I try not to have an opinion about the seal hunt because I don't know enough about the situation to run a mental cost/benefit analysis regarding the cost of something infant being clubbed to death on an ice floe versus the benefit to a badly economically depressed region of clubbing infant things to death. Also, I know any opinion I allow myself to have would be unduly influenced by those awful harp seals in March of the Penguins*.

But yesterday, I found out Morissey is refusing to tour Canada until the hunt is called off, which is just fucking awesome. I have no reason to dislike the man as violently as I do, except that his voice makes me want to kill. He sings some pretty songs and the Smiths played some pretty instruments, but the voice itself – god, it's like watching someone chew on aluminum foil, I JUST WANT IT TO STOP, STOP GODDAMNIT, STOP. One of the most nightmarish things I can imagine is waking up to Morissey in my bedroom singing 'You Are My Sunshine'. I'd rather have Joe Pesci. I'd rather have fucking - fucking - Tom Sizemore singing me that shit, and the man is creepy.

Not much other news today. Reebok has issued a limited edition shoe as part of the Reebobber line that features the crown logo of Jean-Michel Basquiat. So now I fucking hate Reebok. I think the thing that finally drives me out of this job will be that reading five newspapers a day gives me too many things to fucking hate. When my mum was here, she got me a book about Ghengis Khan. Hopefully I'll like him.

*Bob Saget, most famous as a nice man on Full House and America's Funniest Home Videos and the filthiest men alive in the Aristocrats, is making a R-rated mockumentary on March of the Penguins.

2 commenti:

cali ha detto...

That shoe is not good looking.

And I don't like Bob Saget. After watching the first 10 minutes of the Aristocrats and being seriously offended/amazed that ANYONE could find this movie amusing, I decided to not like Bob Saget.

Mistress La Spliffe ha detto...

I didn't find Bob Saget much funnier on the Aristocrats than I did on America's Funniest whatever whatever. Which wasn't much.

There were funny bits to the Aritsocrats! Whoopi Goldberg was funny.

Seriously!