You’ve figured out café lattés are better than drip coffee. Good for you. It long-a-fucking-‘nuff, but now many, if not most of you seem to understand that café lattés are a good thing to be drinking and not just something to mispronounce at Starbucks. Although you still do that very enthusiastically too. Felicitations.
Now, what continues to disturb and disappoint me is that soy and skim café lattés are ubiquitous yet goat milk lattés only make appearances in my kitchen.
Let’s forget that goat milk is cheaper to produce and more globally ubiquitous than cow’s milk because I understand the divide between caker logic and macroeconomic rationality. Let’s even forget that goat milk is easier on the system than cow’s milk and that soy milk is a processed abomination only people with dairy sensitivities should even consider putting in their mouths, because I understand cakers got NO logic when it comes to feeding themselves.
Just remember this: goat milk makes much, much better lattés, and it makes my heart bleed for youse guys that you don’t get to experience that in the course of a normal day. Try. You’ll believe.
Fuck, I hate Starbucks,
Mistress La Spliffe