Tweedle-dee, Tweedle-dum, and Tweedle-doesn't-eat-quite-as-much-shit

Having suggested Obama was vanilla yesterday, today I have to point out that he's still the least repulsive candidate by a long stretch. This was driven home to me last night when we watched the latest Four Corners (an Australian documentary series that I'm using to acclimatize myself to the culture of the country that may be my home someday, as I don't have access to a barbeque or a visible native underclass in Brussels - the Wallonians look just like me). It was quite a crap episode and didn't help me acclimatize to Australia at all as far as I can tell, but there was one moment in it that was fucking beautiful. Let me see if I can find it on YouTube because it was just so good:



What a little shit-eating fuck. What is it with the States that the politicians have to be such shit-eaters? Why can't a right-wing candidate say 'I didn't want any more national holidays because I think they're a waste of money, no matter how marvellous Such-and-Such was, and the black vote wasn't that important in my constituency at the time so, well, there you are', and either be congratulated or criticized for that decision? Why can't that awful creature Clinton say 'okay, that Bosnia thing was kind of a lie, but it sounded good, didn't it? By the way, my husband really fucked that Balkan shit up. He fucked a lot of shit up. Really, putting that cigar in the intern was the least of his fuck-ups. I won't be such a doofus if you vote for me' instead of mis-use words like 'mis-spoke'? Both of those moves might have been mistakes, but they were mistakes that the mistakers probably consulted their advisors about making - there were reasons those 'mistakes' were made - and eating shit in public will not help deal with those reasons.

And in the context of campaigning alongside two champion shit-eaters, Obama looks least worst. His speech after people first noticed his pastor was black and pissed off was not a shit-eating speech. And if his own pastor is now willing to sabotage his candidacy mid-campaign by stoking up the scandal over being black and pissed off - especially by saying he's pretty sure Obama secretly agrees with his thoughts on being black and pissed off, which is tantamount to calling him a liar - maybe I'd drop him too. But then, if I'm anything I'm a Quaker, and we don't have inconvenient, self-aggrandizing, book-selling, collection-plate passing, and in my experience insufferable creatures like pastors. There's a time and a place for mouthing off like a know-it-all madman, and it's called the Internet.